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All of these can be difficult to understand, so you have to honestly evaluate and communicate your tolerance level.
After evaluating all of the pros and cons, the real question isn’t whether you should date a recovering addict, but whether the person has the qualities you want in a romantic partner.
First, the recovering addict should have at least one year of sobriety, and preferably many more.
These provisos are in place to give addicts a fair shot at lasting recovery and to protect the people they might date from falling for someone who is unhealthy, unavailable or worse.
Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough Just as important as assessing the recovering addict’s status is understanding your own. Does addiction strike a nerve with you, perhaps because there’s an addict in your family?
You also need to assess how much baggage you can handle. They may have accrued debts, a criminal record or legal problems, or irrevocably damaged key relationships in their lives that make your interactions with their family and friends tenuous.
You may hear wild stories of drug-fueled sexscapades or run into slippery characters from their past.
As a chronic brain disease, the threat of relapse is ever-present – an estimated 40 to 60 percent of addicts relapse – and watching someone you love spiral out of control can be one of the most horrific experiences of your life.
Of course, not all addicts relapse and those that do are often able to get back on track before too much damage is done, but the threat is there nevertheless.
YOUR DATE IS FASCINATED THAT YOU DON’T DRINK – AND WON’T SHUT UP ABOUT IT The “why” here doesn’t matter.
After dating one dud after another, you finally find someone who seems to have it all – thoughtful, witty, responsible – and good-looking to boot.
Whatever the reason, people who *do* drink CANNOT let it go. THAT MOMENT WHEN YOUR DATE REACHES THE THRESHOLD WHERE HE THINKS HE’S MORE INTERESTING THAN HE ACTUALLY IS We all know that special, endearing moment when an over-served person begins to think everything they say is absolutely mind-blowing (when, in fact, it’s actually getting less coherent by the sip).