Dakota Johnson had the biggest day of her life yesterday – she was topless on set of the new 50 Shades of pathetic women masturbating to basic and easy to understand erotic storylines that are accessible enough for them to not feel guilty about because it’s not officially porn – it’s literature – that might as well be porn – based on how it is used – but that is marketed to every drug store and check out line across america to taunt or titillate every wife and mother bored to fucking death with the life she chose – but unwilling to get off her ass and get her fuck on – so fantasy is her only escape because why live the life you want or think you want – and why do things that make you cum – when you can just imagine them from the comfort of your shitty – middle of the road existence…filled with average sex even shitty sex with a half hard fat husband….

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She’s just got a famous Granny who whored herself to Hitchcock, a Famous mom who has rumored to whore herself to everyone being the daughter of the actress who whored herself to Hitchcock, and a famous dad who was in Miami Vice…when Miami Vice was the biggest, pink neon and white suit wearing shows on TV…

So her career doesn’t impress me, her struggle not real, I mean unless you think being handed a job to keep her out of trouble, when she could just sit around and be paid for, is struggle. But I’ll still watch her very average, even boring, girl you’d see working a coffee shop….

Her name is Dakota Fanning …Dakota Johnson, and all these bitches are interchangeable….

I do find it interesting that her in leggings getting out of a porsche is hotter than her sex scenes in the overhyped romance / sex / porn for old ladies novel…ever…

I don’t know what these pics are for, but I’m thinking it must be a hipster magazine, it has that vibe of instagram “art”…for creeper photogs. 50 shades of rich bratty kid with a trust fund and parents and grandparents that helped her into the industry they are dialed into – so that she doesn’t need to actually get a skill, or job, or leave an impact on the world, but instead can maintain her lifestyle, feel like she’s accomplished something, more than just the trust fund she gets, in another Celebrity kids have access, it’s a small scene, the same people get hired and that’s why all the content produced is shit…

But she is in fitness gear smoking, like most Vegans I love, who are preaching healthy life while sucking on smokes…jokes..

Either way, she’s tanning topless in the new movie, the sequel. 50 year old women who work as Walmart greeters and who soaked their panties reading these books in their shitty small town trailer park homes…are probably dripping to see this….everyone deserves to cum sometimes, you just happen to take that to the extreme with your chronic masturbation. Tilda Swinton must be a great actress, I mean she’d have to be looking the way she does…if she wasn’t a great actress no one would go near her…because she looks like some kind of cartoon character troll…out of some kind of horror movie…but at least she’s skinny.

She’s 55 and naked which is a terrifying concept in and of itself, but throw in a terrifying face and that orange hair – and this is what nightmares, or nightmare sex is based on…..

Dakota Johnson was at the beach with some Jonatan Taylor Thomas looking dude in a bikini top…where she got into a red bikini of her own…like she was some kind of fiery seductive vixen…while really she’s just boring….